Don't Let Troubles Keep You Down

Ever had a string of worrisome things hit in an orchestrated dance? Well, maybe a better visual would be an Olympic track, the biggest there is where all these hurdles are set up in intervals. You come out prancing to music and a roaring crowd, and you’ve had a great night’s sleep, lots of training, and you can’t wait for folks to see your shiny outfit! The starter gun fires, and you’re off at a breakneck pace; in fact, you’re leading. The first hurdle is easy-peasy, and as you sail over the second one, you’re telling yourself very confidently, “I’ve got this”…and then the third one is just a wee bit higher than you had planned, and someone behind you is gaining ground so you start doubting yourself and sabotage the fourth hurdle immediately…your leg clips the hurdle, but you don’t fall…yet…not until the fifth hurdle looks at you like it’s growling and saying “come on, you’re not gonna make it kid,” and you falter for a moment, just enough to throw your timing off and your foot clips and then you…fall…sigh. Yeah, that!

What do you do when you’re lying there feeling like you want to give up? The old me would play hurt, maybe even pretend to be unconscious and wait for them to send the medical team out and haul me off the track where I could spend the rest of my life telling everyone it wasn’t my fault; the hurdle was defective and almost killed me. It works! I used to do it!

But the older, hopefully wiser me now tries to catch my breath and get back up. I even try holding my arms up in triumph and do a little dance to let the crowd know I’m okay, like somehow, I won as I lost my way and you know what? I start running towards the next hurdle with a little bit of victory in my sails because I got back up. Oh, it’s not easy ‘cause my leg is hurtin’ and my pride has dirt on it, but the truth is…life is messy and hurtful and glorious and worth every bit of the work. Will I make it over hurdle number six? That’s the million-dollar question.

I have disappointment in my charmed life all the time. Because of what I do for a living and because I live in a spotlight through social media, people make the assumption my days are filled with rainbows and goats, but the truth is, my days are filled with the same things that fill everybody’s days…lots of choices, lots of anxiety over which ones to make, lots of mistakes, lots of memories causing me sadness and lots of memories that make me smile, lots of disappointments, lots of contemplation and doubt, and lots and lots of love from others and from self. The last one, love… it’s what gives me the courage to get back up and hold my hands in the air, claiming victory.

Love constantly helps me choose joy instead of heartache. Love turns sad memories into gratitude. Love has me look at a quandary from the platform of love instead of fear where I make a better choice. If I let love lead, I am a more joyful person, and if I’m more joyful, I am more likely to sail over the next hurdle.

Recently, I let a comment rob me of my joy, and who was I the most disappointed in? ME! After this whole tirade you are reading, I am still preaching lessons I need to spend time learning. Years of life under me, and I’m still the student. Go figure. However, in the midst of getting my feelings hurt, I did remember a very important thing while my joy was crashing to the earth - forgiveness.

Using this trick helps the person giving it more than the one receiving it. It ain’t easy, folks. The ever-vibrant Italian living inside my DNA always wants to start off slinging meatballs, uh huh, so keeping that in check is a constant battle. When the comment was made, I wanted to light the person up in my best broken English with a host of fiery words, but somewhere (through love) I found the strength to hold my tongue, respond without too much attitude, and remain rational while the Italian within was throwing an all out fit. I might have looked like I was on the verge of passing out (legitimately this time), but I didn’t. I maintained, looked down the track and eyeballed the next hurdle and started jogging.

Wait, I might have had to go to the side of the track and lean over, putting both hands on my knees and catching my breath after getting it knocked out of me with the fall before getting back out on the field, but I didn’t give up. I forgave in my heart and let it go. It still stings and might always sting if I dwell on it, so I’m working on not dwelling on it. There are so many things I want to accomplish on this path before it’s all said and done, and spending time on the negative will slow me down, and I will certainly not clear the next hurdle, that’s for sure. 

The point to all of this is simply complex…Troubles come at you from all directions all the time. You need to train like an Olympic gold medalist to survive the run. But when something trips you up, and it will, don’t let it keep you down because the truth is, troubles can bring you up! Think of it like this: we don’t learn life’s lessons when life is easy; we learn them when it’s not easy. If troubles come along, don’t fall down and play like you’ve been knocked out. Play to win! There, I said it!

Donna Ulisse

donnaulisse.com